Monday, January 3, 2011

It's not about seeing things, it's about how one sees things.

Soo you've been programmed since you were a 16 year old teen dating an 18 year old teen, yet BLATANTLY violating that black-and-white Chris Hanson-grade to-catch-a-predator notion that all hoomans suddenly turn whatever overnight at whatever age, and even bending the lines in such a retarded and negative-power-heavy system, it leaves a HUGE and ugly gap between the fact that people can be brought into this world as slaves to their parents, at yet at the same time, at present state, there is no authority or balance check figure to make sure they don't get programmed into _____ and then understand the story overlaying it is flawed but that the essence of religion is to find the ways of revving the inner Happiness equations without the need or admirable desire of seeking in or acting on lust without love, honesty, and trust underlying it, and for one to choose in that way routinely or repeatedly is just a flawed behavioral addiction to some extent, itg cannot not be, 4 Christ's sake - just LOOK at how powerful and devastating the power of association surrouding it can be.

See, the different thing about me that no one seems to respect is, when it comes to Love, what makes me feel attraction is the thought of having something amazing and Beautiful inside and out and cares only about me most of all as I would her in that token reciprocal exchange of ultimate investment, trust, protection, and exclusive/open/honest dynamic and full-disclosure preemptive foundation on which it was built to provide mutual protection within the truth dedicated and communicated.

I see the way in which somethings appeal to others, but what I would really expect at this point is some true friends and job offers that have nothing to do with me being naked whatsoever, as it seems that would be a far more sane and history-saving 4-year-overdue step to lead with instead of showing seemingly relative lack of respect for me as a human being in a known and clearly designed position...to a point.

That some completely inverted and pushed on me...which is weird...flattering I guess by that world thinking and standards I guess...but to my completely non-sexual interest in acquiring good examples of friends and brand affiliates, weird.

What if I have no interest in being a sexual predator?

Is that not OK?

Is the world really that whatever, that I can't just have some direct set and production crew-grade coverage instead of the world having to existing in ways that I was lied to about for the better part of 3 decades, while being blah, blah, blah Better and engineering designs around different models based on approaching it the same way as other very powerful and dangerously addictive things?

And what about the fact that, for me to have a girl around that I want to tolerate or hang out intimately with, the 'two-numbs-one-womb' equations in her mind when contrasted with any normal social situation would completely undermine my everything.

So why is that being pushed on me instead of just giving me infinitely not-the-complete-opposite-of-what-I-want-or-asked-for?

All those/you people can do whatever. What concerns me is trust and intent and circumstance and the full-circle 360 nature of everything in existence.  That is all.

Am I so wrong for not wanting things that have been touched by so many they have no value in touching to me and in fact the thought of it makes me feel as if I'm devaluing myself the way I-can't-even-believe-what-I-once-thought-were-Dreem-Girls seemingly have?

Sigh.  I could never understand why my father thought so poorly of women and yet my mom seemed fully willing to accept the complete hypocricy in that she was married to him and loved him. But I guess everyone's programming comes from somewhere, and if you dig all the way back to the source reasons, God I hope any/all things responsible for other things sure lead back to something more valuable than only being obsessed with using the hooman body in a sexual manner, because it's almost like the rights of the unborn are being violated.

When people are silent or lie to cover-up the 2+2=5 nature of their existence, is that

1 comment:

  1. Congrats on you're randomly-stumbled-across-and-reworking-technology-validation and "Perfectly Enough for and example of CONTEXT and relativity". I miss Me. I bet a lot of people do to. Which only makes one wonder where all these

    ReplyDelete